The school
summer holidays are finally here. Great news for happy families who can’t wait
to spend some quality time together, building sandcastles on Cornish beaches or
exploring the antiquities of ancient Greece. Not-so-great news, though, for
fractured families who may be dreading the next few weeks, viewing it more as
an ordeal than a jolly, carefree time.
If you have
recently been through divorce or separation, the lengthy holiday might be your
first big test in terms not only of caring for your children on your own but also
ensuring they have a good time.
The first
thing to do is to plan carefully what you are going to do, taking into
consideration your children’s wishes, your budget, your support network and
your work commitments.
However
difficult your relationship with your ex-partner may be, do aim to include them
in your plans. If you are the main carer, get your ex to commit to having the
children for at least one week during the summer – if they are able to take
them on holiday, so much the better. Not only will this be good for the kids,
it will give you a much-needed break, too. Perhaps you can arrange to go away
yourself independently – either on your own or with a friend.
Although the
school summer break is synonymous with beach holidays, kids can have just as
much fun doing other things. If you can’t afford a seaside sojourn or don’t
fancy taking the children away on your own, arrange to spend a week with
friends or relatives. A change of scene can be a holiday in itself.
Find out
what children’s activities/holiday clubs are available in your area and, if
your children are old enough, book them in.
If you have business
commitments during the summer, maybe you could arrange for the kids to go to
friends’ houses or for grandparents or other relatives to come to your house to
look after them. Grandparents, too, are affected by divorce. An opportunity to
bond or be a confidant for fragile grandchildren may be very useful. Ringing
the changes in terms of who looks after the children can help to create a
holiday atmosphere.
You, too,
may be feeling a little fragile, but if the children are old enough to be
semi-independent, resist the urge to be too protective.
Organising a
couple of day trips with the kids will help to make the summer special and
allow you to share an adventure.
Don’t allow
inclement weather to put paid to your plans. Just make sure you dress
accordingly. Adversity is good for bonding!
Finally,
don’t panic. Six weeks may seem like a very long time to keep the kids occupied
and September is a long way off. Nevertheless, the holidays can be both
manageable and pleasurable. And remember, having a good time doesn’t have to
mean spending lots of money. Kids are very resilient and imaginative and, with
encouragement, can enjoy themselves just as much in the back garden as on an
exotic beach.

